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| menace64 |
 Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2007 7:05 pm |
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Joined: 12 Apr 2006
Posts: 836
Location: Wichita, Kansas
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Alright, sports fans. I actually wrote something I’m proud of!
Deadrock is a two-part book series I ’plan’ to write, and since it doesn’t seem too complicated, I think I can actually write it based on my current abilities. The first book, Deadrock and the Sundering Crescent actually takes place after some of the biggest events of the overall history of my story, which is - I think - an interesting twist. The reader will jump into the middle of chaos, with characters already undergoing stress and changed from past victories and failures (and, as usual with my stories, lots of failures).
So, without more stalling, here’s my prologue. It sets up a bit of the location, the main character, and some hints of the history that’s already occurred.
It was a fair morning on Crescent, even as fair mornings often went. Somewhere into the high horizon, where the looming arm of the thumbnail-shaped space station faded to an obscure point beyond the clouds, the distant-but-gracious Sova was shedding her morning light upon the artificial world.
Today was the first day of the Month of the Summit, birth-month to Lucian Wright and a day of celebration, joyfulness, and well-wishing to others. But Lucian found himself lost in a tumult of dark thoughts. He sat alone, cold and bitter, on a hard bench made of a wood he didn’t recognize, and stared blankly at the sunrise that should have filled him with something he couldn’t name. Something inspiring.
He allowed himself a crooked grin, as he often did when he realized it had been too long since his last smile. He reached back in his mind to the events of the previous few months - events he now regretted ever having been a part of. Grudgingly he admitted that, had he sat peacefully aside and done nothing, Crescent - the home of the last remnant of Humanity - would most likely be drifting through a lifeless pocket of space... in many billions of tiny pieces.
But those memories of his grand escapades - so horribly ingrained in his mind - couldn’t hold up to what was actually troubling him. His thoughts betrayed him as they drifted too close to his heart: the memory of his father’s recent funeral flooded through him and pierced him with its icy sting. What hurt him worse still was the knowledge that, somewhere in the high horizon where Crescent station came to its cheerless end, his mother sat in her house grieving alone, while he, her only son, sat on a park bench, refusing to lend her any kind of support.
Lucian sat immobile and watched Sova cross the Upside arm of Crescent and begin her graceful ark through the artificial sky. He knew that, if he stayed where he sat long enough, he would see the sudden mesmerizing appearance of Deadrock in the center of the sky before it flashed out again like a dying star - a mere trick of light reflecting this way and that, perhaps, but to Lucian it was always a bit more than science could explain.
Deadrock.
Deadrock. The source of Humanity’s salvation and, in Lucian’s words from the not-too-distant past, "its clutching addiction." Lucian was largely against the heavy mining taking place at all times on the enormous planet, but even he could not deny the seemingly endless uses of the always-abundant, always-coveted curbite. He could neither ignore the compound’s simple beauty nor its strength and resilience.
Another crooked grin slipped from his gloomy demeanor. Beyond the park on all sides the precise, purposeful glow of many high-rise crimson towers - the very same suffocating-red that gave curbite its wonder and majesty - seemed to crawl off in every direction. The towers tramped off into the sky, stretching from one end of the Crescent to the other. Lucian wondered if any other color really mattered anymore. He wondered what living on a real planet would be like. One horizon. Many skies.
Lucian absently began to finger the stiff rank insignia on his left shoulder. Stitched in haste from times more pressing, he kept asking himself what he’d done to deserve his promotion to choir leader. There was no war, no fighting to speak of, that would have warranted his step up in the military ladder. Only a deed done out of necessity to save a girl’s life; and even then Lucian knew he did what anyone else on Crescent would have done in his place. Being in the Lord’s Service had nothing to do with his actions, and those actions hardly deserved praise.
Suddenly, right on schedule, the planet Deadrock’s distorted reflection splashed into Crescent’s solid-clear atmosphere. The reflection danced and swayed, its hazy outline making it difficult to determine whether or not it was a shape at all. It seemed to move of its own indecisive will, choosing all at once to remain static and to remain in motion. But it was sharp, and it nearly filled the sky.
Then, in the blink of a moment that seemed to end without truly beginning, Deadrock vanished. The image Lucian and all the population of the crescent-shaped space station witnessed was of special significance, but it was no more than an optical illusion. In truth, Deadrock was far away, too far away to see during the daytime.
This event marked the beginning of the Month of the Summit. Lucian Wright was not going to celebrate. He sat at his cheerless bench, watching Sova pass through the sky, and realized that he had very little reason to be happy anymore. |
Last edited by menace64 on Sun Oct 28, 2007 4:43 pm; edited 1 time in totalRiddle 9
When I came to Abraham I let him live just a moment longer. When I came to Moses I saved his life more than once. But the salmon... I regret to say I had a hand in its death.
Who am I? |
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| sickofpalantirs |
| Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2007 7:20 pm |
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Joined: 23 Mar 2006
Posts: 7750
Location: somwhere, over the rainbow way up high. There's a land that I heard of once in a lullaby.
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| weird...I don’t know if I fully understand the plot... |
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Spammers really are amazing creatures. You can learn all there is to know about their ways in a month. And yet, after a hundred years, they can still surprise you.  |
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| menace64 |
| Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2007 7:39 pm |
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Joined: 12 Apr 2006
Posts: 836
Location: Wichita, Kansas
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sickofpalantirs wrote: weird...I don’t know if I fully understand the plot...
That’s because it’s the prologue. There isn’t a plot for you to follow yet.  |
Riddle 9
When I came to Abraham I let him live just a moment longer. When I came to Moses I saved his life more than once. But the salmon... I regret to say I had a hand in its death.
Who am I? |
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| bobtheorc |
| Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2007 8:07 pm |
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Joined: 19 Mar 2006
Posts: 1218
Location: Wow, its hot in Iowa
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| menace64 |
| Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2007 8:11 pm |
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Joined: 12 Apr 2006
Posts: 836
Location: Wichita, Kansas
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| lol, I may. I may. But it’s so juicy and sweet and everything neat. |
Riddle 9
When I came to Abraham I let him live just a moment longer. When I came to Moses I saved his life more than once. But the salmon... I regret to say I had a hand in its death.
Who am I? |
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| macheteman |
| Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2007 8:19 pm |
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Joined: 07 Dec 2006
Posts: 1200
Location: The Jungle
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| so, they are on an artificial planet, eh? did they build it? what does "artificial" mean? |
Check out my best article The Utterly Corrupt Corruption,
If at first you don't succeed...Sky-diving isn't for you.
"Combat is dangerous. It tends to interupt your breathing process."
ROLF!!! |
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| menace64 |
| Posted: Mon Oct 15, 2007 10:22 pm |
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Joined: 12 Apr 2006
Posts: 836
Location: Wichita, Kansas
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Okay. Since it should be a little while before I have a significant portion of the actual story finished, I’ll outline a bit of the characters/plot/history for you all.
Enjoy the sneak.
At some point in our mid-future, we ’dominated’ space, as Spanish sailors ’dominated’ water. We thought we were something special, some force to be reckoned with. But then we ran into the Xenthu.
Now, before I go on, ’xenthu’ was a termed coined by humans to refer to these aliens (xeno = alien, xenthu = the real deal).
So, the Xenthu own everything this side of the galaxy (well, they own the other side, too). They’ve got the galaxy in the palm of their hands; whether because there wasn’t any competition or they just squashed all other races is up in the air. We, suddenly puny and pathetic, tried desperately to defend ourselves from them, but failed horribly and died off.
Except for a few lucky little ships that faded off together into the blackness. For thousands of years, they traveled as nomads through the stars, gradually forgetting the galactic horror around every corner and reverting to a more primitive existence. The Xenthu became science-fiction.
Then, one day, the human remnant stumbled upon a planet: Deadrock. It was by far the largest terrestrial planet ever discovered (by them, anyways) and it was an extremely unforgiving environment. Seas of liquid arsenic, skies of meandering ash, and two moons virtually unlandable - not quite a vacation spot. But they stayed. Why?
Curbite. The Rock of Life.
At first, these simple humans stuck around Deadrock because of curbite’s beauty. Hunters would travel to the surface on daring missions to obtain any above-ground curbite, often to their own injury or (usually) death. But over time, the human vessels became loaded with curbite, and it found its way into the very heart of their culture.
Eventually, a smart scientist came around and ran some tests on curbite, only to discover that, for whatever freakish reason, when the rock was accelerated in a vacuum, it produced energy... undying energy. So as long as they could keep curbite in a vacuum-tight jar, they had a power plant.
Thus, Humanity jumpstarted. Crescent was built. An entire starfleet of cruisers and fighter squadrons was built and staffed within 100 years. Everything changed.
Humanity was powerful. Tapping into curbite’s limitless potential, they made great leaps in science, far surpassing their forgotten enemy, the Xenthu. But they were still very few, and it would be only a matter of time before they were rediscovered by the looming shadow.
(That’s all the backstory you get!)
Lucian Wright was born 524 years after Crescent became operational. All you get to know about him for now is that, through the events leading up to my prologue above, he came into contact with a strange little girl. This girl, a product of odd science and an extreme accident elsewhere on the station, was a paradox to physics and the universe itself (kind of like curbite). He saved her life, and unwittingly cast his lot among the greats of his race.
Then, sure enough, the Xenthu show up, and after losing their first re-encounter with the Humans, they get super-angry and launch an all-out assault against Crescent.
Yup. I’ve got quite a bit written out about the Xenthu as well (they aren’t so much your stereotypical war-loving aliens), but that information is to lay buried for some time still. |
Riddle 9
When I came to Abraham I let him live just a moment longer. When I came to Moses I saved his life more than once. But the salmon... I regret to say I had a hand in its death.
Who am I? |
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| lem0nhead |
| Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2007 5:34 am |
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Joined: 02 Apr 2007
Posts: 2981
Location: Blood Island
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Sounds cool. Maybe your calling isnt the air force. You sound a pretty good fantasy writer. We already know your "the most likely to make his own TCG" set. This could be those 2 things combined.
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Ban shampoo, demand real poo.
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| Gate Troll |
| Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2007 12:35 pm |
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Joined: 15 Aug 2006
Posts: 384
Location: Udun Vale, Home of the one and only... Gate Troll!
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Cool. It’s very interesting, I like the ideas. Anymore forthcoming?  |
| "Wars may be fought with weapons, but they are won by men. It is the spirit of the men who follow and of the man who leads that gains that victory."-George S. Patton. |
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| menace64 |
| Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2007 1:13 pm |
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Joined: 12 Apr 2006
Posts: 836
Location: Wichita, Kansas
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Gate Troll wrote: Cool. It’s very interesting, I like the ideas. Anymore forthcoming?
Well, I plan on spending some time writing up at Borders later today. It seems I work better in that environment than I do at home.
Thanks for all the responses, fellas. It does nothing but encourage me to keep going! |
Riddle 9
When I came to Abraham I let him live just a moment longer. When I came to Moses I saved his life more than once. But the salmon... I regret to say I had a hand in its death.
Who am I? |
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